Choose Your Channel at Home

I don't know what it is about people. They are just so demanding sometimes. Why do so many people go into a restaurant and demand that somebody change the channel so they can watch a certain show/sporting event.
You wouldn't go over to your friends house and demand that they change the channel for you, would you? So why would you do it to somebody that you don't even know?
Changing the TV in a restaurant is not easy, most of the time, somebody has to go all the way to the back  and find a remote. They then have look up what channel a certain game is on and then they have to find the paper with the list of channels on it and then they have to change the channel. Even changing the channel can be difficult, when there are multiple TV's in a restaurant (mine has 11) there's going to be a huge stack of receivers which may or may not be properly labeled. I have to find the right receiver for the TV, then cover up all of the other receivers and then I can start pushing the buttons, but I don't know if it I pressed the buttons all the way because I don't have a screen to show me what I'm doing, I just kind of hope for the best.
Here's a few tips when asking for a channel to be changed:

• Don't ask somebody to change the channel to "the game." This is very annoying because there are about a hundred different ESPN's, Fox Sports Nets, and whatever else and there is a game on, I can't read minds and say which one you want. Tell me that you would like to see the Raiders game (that way I know you're a complete idiot) 
• Don't demand it to be done, it can take 5-10 minutes to change a channel and that sometimes just can't be done during rush periods, also, some restaurants have the receivers locked away in a closet in the manager's office and they won't be able to get in
• Don't ask for it to be changed to cartoons for your kid, the History Channel for a documentary on the Apocalypse or, E! so you can keep up with the freaking Kardashians because this is not your living room, we have a certain clientele that we cater to, and that clientele wants to watch Sports.

Booths are for 4 People

There are six words that every host hears on a daily basis "Do You have any booths available."

These words suck to hear. They tell me a lot about you.
It let's me know that you're going to want lemon in your water (which implies a lot of other stuff about you)
And that you want things your way and you will probably try to kill me if they don't go your way.
And finally, that you're a rude person, I know that because the conversation will normally go like this:

*Opens Door*
ME: Hello, how are you all doin-
DOUCHE (you): Four, for a booth douchefully holding up the number four on your hand
ME: in my head fucking, rude ass mother fuckin...

Unfortunately for you, every other person in the metropolitan area decided that they would, also, like a booth. But I can assure you that the food will taste the same no matter where you sit.
I understand that booths are all cushy and comfortable and stuff, but that's also what your couch is for, if you like to eat on a couch you can go home.

The number of people who try to fit more than 4 people in a booth never ceases to amaze me. I just don't understand people who walk in and are like "7, for a booth" never mind that you walked in with a party of 6 or more without a reservation but you are also demanding a four person booth? I know some restaurants do have those big round booths but if you take two seconds to look around you will notice that we don't have those. So your big party ass is going to have to sit at a table because you have too many fucking people.

One more thing before I bid farewell, what is with the person who insists on sitting in the inside but then has to get up every 5 minutes, seriously, why do you have friends? I am friends with a person who does this and I want to cry every time we go out to eat. *End Side Rant*

Stupid Parent

So yeah, it's pretty much impossible to have a blog dealing with a restaurant and not mention something about how annoying children are. Let me make this clear; I don't dislike the kids, it's the PARENTS that I really have a problem with, you really can't help how you're being raised. Parents will let their kids make a mess out of a restaurant and then leave a minimal tip. What may be worse than that is when parents allow their children to run around the restaurant by themselves. Kids are short, when I'm carrying a huge tray, I will have a hard time seeing them, while I've never run over a kid, I could see it easily happening. Anyway, I really wanted to talk about the experience I had with a child today.
I was working the breakfast shift this morning, I got my ass to work at 5:30 and opened at 6:05 (don't tell my boss.) I close that shit down right at 9:30. I had this bitch walk in at 9:45 dragging her bratty ass children down demanding breakfast. Since I was lazy and didn't but anything away yet, and because I'm such a wonderful individual, I let them in. Now she was dragging this kid who had to be at least 5 or 6 who was SCREAMING. And I don't mean just a little whining I mean, I went to the cooler in the back and still heard that monster. It was crazy, I just wanted to crawl up in a corner and sleep. I was completely done with that bitch after she complained that we didn't have any bacon. First of all we had sausage instead of bacon that day, we only have one or the other because it's a free fucking breakfast. Second of all, she showed up 15 minutes after it closed so she shouldn't be expecting anything. We also ran out of cranberry juice so I graciously got her some more because I'm so freaking nice, (and the bar would need it for drinks and such anyway.) But who the fuck drinks cranberry juice, especially when you're not 101 years old? The best part about this bitch was that she named her kid Thomas, not as in the Tank Engine but TOEmas as in, the kind of name you would expect of a fashion designer. Who would to that to a child?
Yup, that's just one of the many parents who feel entitled because they feel as though they were the first woman on the planet to ever push a baby through their vagina. (I suspect this demon child was birthed through a cesarean because that's what pretentious mothers do right?)